“Selfish” is not a four-letter word.
We’re taught from infancy that being selfish is bad.
We condition ourselves to believe we must be selfLESS to be good.
That story we tell ourselves results in frustration, exhaustion, and burnout.
We’re missing the nuances of being selfish.
While it’s advisable to avoid being “aggressively selfish” – displaying toxic behaviour that comes from only caring about your needs and seeking to meet your needs and wants at the expense of everyone else,
it’s important to be “assertively selfish” – and have healthy behaviours that come from taking care of your own needs while being respectful of the needs of others.
Self-care, reducing stress, and avoiding burnout all require us to be “assertively selfish.”
As the old adage goes, we can’t pour from an empty cup.
We need to “be selfish” and say no to things we don’t have time and energy for.
The people who truly care about us will understand.
And the ones who rely heavily on you sacrificing your needs so they don’t have to sacrifice their wants?
They’ll be upset.
They’ll cry “SELFISH!”
Your response? “Absolutely, thank you for noticing!”